Just a Bath
by Cara de la Luna
Summary: Post-series. A cabin by the lake. An overly stressed teenage witch. A midnight escapade. Amon's fears of his feelings for Robin and the thought of losing her have driven him to extremes. Drama and angst on the lighter end of the scale. PLEASE REVIEW!
1. Asphyxia

Disclaimer: I don't own WHR, etc.

*~ Asphyxia ~*

Robin stared angrily at the bathroom door. She was already clothed in the oversized faded black t-shirt she wore while she went through her nightly routine, her golden hair hanging loose about her shoulders. She dreaded the prospect of entering the small bathroom in her bedroom as she went through the motions leading to her nightly bath.

For there would be no bath tonight. Again.

They had stayed at a few hotels and apartments that had only been equipped with only a shower fixture during the six months they'd spent traveling across Europe after the Factory's collapse. It hadn't bothered her in the past: they usually stayed only a couple of days at each hotel. But this time Amon had decided to rent the small, lake-adjacent summer cottage where they currently found themselves for an entire month. _One month_ without the comforting, cathartic ritual that had marked the end of each day for Robin for as along as she could remember.

It was more than just a habit, unlike most of her other compulsive daily actions. Out of habit, she would diligently clean already pristine hotel rooms, ignoring Amon's annoyed looks. Out of habit, she would style her hair in two bizarre pigtails every morning – it had been the hairstyle mandated for novices in the convent, worn underneath the white veil. Out of habit, she would drink a cup of espresso first thing in the morning and after every meal, even during the heat of summertime. But her _nightly baths_, those were not simply a habit. They were as necessary as sleep and food.

For Robin, her nightly bath was the cleansing of her body, mind and spirit from the hardships and frustrations that had built up throughout the day.

It was a celebration for having enjoyed another day, for having lived to seek out the beautiful things ignored by most people but which reassured her of God's existance: a kind gesture from a complete stranger, the wind blowing gently against her face, the beauty of the sunset…

It was a comforting embrace of her body by the warm water, the only kind of embrace she had ever counted on in the absence of parents, of friends and family within the coldness of the detached, rigid environment where she had lived her childhood.

It was a solace from the ever present reality of her grim situation as a fugitive witch.

It was a form of re-energizing her mind and body so she could deal with another day of uncertainty, of running and hiding.

It was the only time she had alone with her feelings and thoughts, away from Amon's constant stare, away from the weariness she knew she caused him.

On top of all that, lying in a bathtub, soaking until her body pruned all over and the water turned icy cold, was the one and _only_ pleasure Robin allowed herself. She had never permitted the selfish, petulant, temper of a teenager to gain control over her mind. That is, until she had been forced to give up the closest thing to pampering that she'd ever had.

She glared even more intently at the closed bathroom door, clutching a white towel to her chest.

They had been at the cabin for 3 weeks already, and in the absence of her purifying ritual, she could feel herself grow more and more anxious as the days went by. She felt exhausted, heavy, irritable and sullen.

And sad. She felt so sad, and she knew her ever watchful warden would certainly notice the change.

If she hung around him too much he would either, 1) be annoyed by her new irritable disposition, or 2) would suspect that it had something to do with her increasing powers, and then he would drill Robin for hours with questions about her craft. And if he were to extract the _real_ cause of her bad temper during his interrogation session…. Robin could picture his reaction in her mind; Amon scoffing at her, calling her childish and immature and dismissing her sacred bathing ritual as ridiculous. And Robin _absolutely refused_ to give him the pleasure of making her feel like a silly little girl. The last thing Robin needed was to give Amon another reason to call her childish, not when she had to constantly remind him that she wasn't a child, that she was mature enough to have some say in the decisions that determined the course of her life, decisions that he usually made on his own.

So she tried to avoid Amon as much as possible in the small house. She spent most of her day in her room, reading old books she'd collected during their travels for hours on end. Occasionally, she would venture downstairs to stare out the living room window at the beautiful view of the surrounding woods and the sliver of the lake that peeked out from beyond the forest line. She had a good view of the scenery from where their cabin sat at the top of a small hill, and though she found the quiet and peace comforting, she felt too weary in her current state to go out for a walk in the beautiful place. Something that, under normal circumstances, she would do every day without fault.

Amon would doubtlessly be puzzled by her self-imposed isolation, and honestly it was starting to make her feel trapped. But it was either that or having to face Amon and his questioning glare. So she opted for voluntary imprisonment rather than facing interrogation by her warden.

Robin closed her eyes and let out a long sigh.

She _wished_ she could tell him. She wished she could reach out to Amon, remove at least one small part of the wall he'd erected around himself to peek at her former partner's impenetrable mind. She wished she could just…talk to him, talk about anything else besides their future travel plans…not that she ever really had a part in those 'discussions', anyway. Robin had tried to spark conversation with Amon in the beginning, but he had been annoyed with her attempts. So she eventually gave up, and sometimes they would go an entire day without exchanging more than 2 sentences. The constant silence only reminded her that Amon was not there with her because he wanted to, but because he had to. The knowledge that he was there to protect others from made the quiet longing she felt for him all the more painful. She could never tell him how deeply she cared about him, not when his only concern over her was the possibility of her losing control. So instead, Robin tried to fill the silence with optimism, even when she knew it was just for show. She needed to regain that state of mind, she needed to try to be positive again, or she would surely be driven crazy by the silence and the seclusion.

Shaking her head lightly, Robin snapped herself out her inner musings. Instead, she returned her attention to the silent battle of wills between herself and the bathroom door.

When they had first arrived at the beautiful little cabin by the lake, Robin had found the place refreshing. During the first few days at their new hiding spot (and before her gradual descent into bath-withdrawal), Robin would take walks in the surrounding forest paths during the day (with Amon in tow a few paces behind her) and stare at the aquamarine color of the mountain lake. Back then, she had even toyed with the idea of going for a swim, but it had been too cold in the early days of spring to allow Robin a dip in the inviting waters.

However, it was now mid May and the temperatures had begun to rise as summer approached.

_'In fact...today was particularly hot during the day; the temperature felt more like mid June than spring,' _Robin mused with an idea popping up in her head.

She bit down on her lower lip and felt hope rising in her chest as she turned away from her nemesis, the bathroom door, and walked to the window next to her bed, dropping the towel she'd been holding carelessly on the floor.

She drew the curtains and pushed the window open. Sticking out her arm and head, she tried to feel the nighttime temperature. A light, pine-scented breeze tickled her face as she breathed in deeply.

With a smile on her lips she pulled back inside the room.

The night air still felt warm, maybe even warm enough to allow for a quick dip in the lake.

A pensive frown replaced her smile, her teeth biting onto her lower lip once more. Did she dare?

She thought of the first and most important unbreakable rule in Amon's long list of unbreakable rules:

Rule 1: Never go out alone.

This was followed immediately by an equally annoying command.

Rule 2: Never do, think, or think of doing _anything_ without consulting Amon.

The rest of the list was not any more encouraging, though the other rules did not directly apply to the situation as much as the first two.

Amon would be furious when he found out that she had disobeyed him. But…Why did he have to know?

Feeling something akin to teenage rebellion and anger, Robin let her most reckless side take over. _I'm just going to check that the water isn't too cold; I'll be back in 10 minutes. He probably already went to bed anyway, _she rationalized.

Feeling her spirits rise for the first time in weeks, she pushed the windows open all the way. Her room was on the second floor across from Amon's and she couldn't risk getting caught if she was heard in the hallway. She peered out the window and smiled even more intently. It would be easy enough to get out the window and walk on the roof of the first floor before climbing down the rain gutter pipe.

Feeling giddy with childish excitement at the prospect of her little adventure, Robin made her way cautiously over the roof and down the drain pipe.

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Amon lay awake and clothed on his bed, arms behind his head, staring at the ceiling. Something had been bothering him for days. He was concerned about Robin's recent change in behavior. Her usually optimistic self had slowly been replaced by a forlorn, miserable semblance of the Robin he knew.

During the months they'd been on the run, Robin had always managed to remain hopeful, drawing on that quiet strength she had about her, that resilient strength that Amon admired so much about her, that which kept her going even when faced with so many formidable obstacles in her life. And as hard as it was for Amon to admit, he knew that his behavior towards Robin took a toll on her strength's reserves that rivaled those caused by Solomon.

He knew he was a difficult person to coexist with. He had lived alone since a very young age, and now he found himself having to constantly look after someone else. It didn't help that said someone else was a teenage girl.

A teenage girl who was a former _nun_.

A teenage girl who was a former nun and a _witch_.

A teenage girl who was a former nun and a witch,maybe the _most powerful_ witch in existence.

Amon sighed and ran a hand slowly through his hair.

This teenaged, former nun, possible most-powerful-witch-in-existence was also the person Amon found himself in love with, against his better judgment.

He could never allow himself to close the distance that he imposed between them. As if the above list weren't enough to warn him against getting too close, Amon had learned from an early age that love could bring unbearable pain, when the person you love is lost, when they lose control, when their powers corrupted their very soul…

For all of these reasons Amon kept a detached and distant exterior. As far as Robin knew, he was there as her guardian, out of some sense of guilt or obligation or whatever she thought compelled him to keep watch over her. She could never have imagined that the reason Amon would follow her to the ends of the world was because he did not want to be away from her, couldn't stand the idea of her being in danger, running from Solomon by herself.

He knew her powers had not corrupted her. The girl did not seem to have an ounce of malice in her. Instead, she opted to seek out the good things in life, she chose to smile through her pain, she chose faith and resignation...

Until recently, that is. Amon had seen her break down before, but she would usually pick herself up almost instantly. She did not allow herself weakness or self-pity.

But now... Maybe she'd just hidden the extent of her despair from him all this time, and her mask was finally beginning to crack…

Whatever the reason was, the sadness in her eyes always broke his heart, and Robin's eyes had shown him nothing but sadness for days now. When she wasn't locked up in her room, she would just sit there with a miserable expression, looking lost and tired.

_She must feel lonely_, he thought with remorse._ She_ _must feel depressed and hopeless_. She was a young, beautiful, vibrant girl trapped in a tiny cage with a stone guardian.

Late at night he would stand outside her room, checking on her without her knowing. Occasionally he would venture a peek inside her room and every time he would find her sound asleep in her bed, a pale shoulder peeking out from under the covers a telltale sign of her nakedness, and a serene expression on her face suggesting that at least in sleep, her troubles did not haunt her. Just one furtive look at her like this could reassure Amon enough to continue with his charade another day.

He glanced at the clock on his night stand. It was almost midnight. She would be asleep by now. It was time to go check on his precious burden.


	2. Paranoia

_"A whisper, a whisper, a whisper, a whisper  
A whisper, a whisper, a whisper, a whisper  
I hear a sound  
The ticking of clocks  
I remember your face  
Remember to see when you are lost_

I hear the sound  
The ticking of clocks  
Come back and look for me, look for me  
When I am lost"

_-A Whisper, Cold Play_

~* Paranoia *~

Amon exited his room silently and walked the few paces to stand outside Robin's door. The large windows on the far end of the hallway let in the silver rays of moonlight, lighting up the second story of the house. He stood motionless for a few seconds, trying to hear any sounds that indicated Robin was still awake, but the house was completely silent. Deciding it was safe to check on his young charge, Amon opened the door just a crack to glance inside the room.

The moonlight illuminated the room in the same manner as the hallway, revealing an empty, perfectly made bed in the quiet space. Amon furrowed his brow as he opened the door fully and stalked inside, his eyes scanning the room for any sign of Robin. Her full suitcase sat neatly at the foot her bed. A half read book lay open on the bedside table. Nothing seemed out of place.

He walked towards the small bathroom next to the bed. "Robin?" He opened the door, without bothering to knock, to reveal more emptiness.

Panic began to set in. He had seen her go into her room and had not heard her come out at all. His eye caught the fluttering of the white silk drapes on the open window, looking like white ghosts dancing in the moonlight. His heart froze.

"Dammit!" His mind raced with countless questions. Could hunters have taken her from right under his nose? There were no signs of struggle, no signs of forced entry and he hadn't heard a thing as he lay awake just across the hall. Had she escaped of her own free will? Why would she leave all of her things behind? She had left everything untouched, items laying casually about the room where she had used them.

His eyes fell on the towel lying crumpled between the bed and the window. It was the only thing out of place in the pristine room of a compulsive clean freak.

It had to be hunters. They could have hypnotized her, lured her out, they could have fucking possessed her for all he knew!

He raced back to his room and pulled out the gun that he kept on his nightstand. He searched the first floor of the house, gun ready to shoot at any intruder, but everything was perfectly still and quiet.

He ran outside, his eyes searching in the half darkness for any signs, anyone, anything. His rented car was parked in its usual spot, the earth on the driveway completely undisturbed. He would have heard cars coming in; his window looked right out onto the road that led away from the cabin.

Before he could realize it he was running down the only other escape route; the forest trail leading down to the lake.

He could hear his heart pounding in his ears, hear the sharp intake of his breath as he raced down the path. It only took him 5 minutes to come within view of the water.

He heard a small splash in the dead silence of the night. His body sped up and within seconds he was in full view of the lake at the edge of the short stone drop off a few feet above the water.

His body came to a sudden stop, frozen in place by the sight before him. Some distance off from the shore, surrounded by the silver halo of the moon's reflection, a young girl floated lazily on her back on the water. Her arms moved gracefully in small semi circles beside her head, her feet kicking gently against the surface, creating tiny ripples around her.

All of his fear forgotten, Amon stared mesmerized at Robin's beautiful form. Her body was covered only by a black shirt that ended mid thigh; her pale skin reflected the light from the moon, giving off an ethereal silver glow of its own. Her golden hair fanned out around her, flowing on the water surface. The scene before Amon looked like something from the pictures of a fairy tale book; she looked like a water nymph, a wood spirit… _A goddess_, Amon thought.

Her limbs moved so gently that she did not move on the water, she merely floated there, suspended on the moonlight, looking so delicate and small in the vastness of the lake that Amon thought she would disappear completely if he so much as blinked.

His musings were brought to a halt when Robin suddenly changed position, her lower body sinking into the darkness. With her back turned to him, her shoulders and head hovered above the water as her arms made wider movements.

The spell she'd held on him finally broken, Amon's mind resumed its previous train of thought. What was she doing out here, in the middle of the night, alone and unprotected?

Robin let out the air from her lungs and he saw her form disappearing completely below the surface. As seconds went by with no signs of movement, Amon's thoughts from earlier that night returned all at once. Just as it had disappeared, fear crept suddenly back into his being.

The change in her attitude, the obvious sadness, the hopelessness in her eyes, her self-imposed solitary confinement... the fact that she'd sneaked out on her own was so uncharacteristic, so drastic…

Robin did not re-emerge; almost a full minute had gone by. Could she have taken something? Could she have left her room tonight with the intention of not returning home? Could she attempt to drown in the depths of the lake? could she really have been that deep in her despair?

Again his body acted of its own accord, not willing to wait for his mind to decide on an answer. Amon ran to the edge of the rock and dove into the water, swiftly swimming across the distance from the shore to where Robin's body had disappeared.

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Robin let out all the air from her lungs, letting her body sink slowly. She hugged her legs to her chest, curling into an up right fetal position as she sank deeper into the water. She let the gentle current rock her back and forth, feeling safe in the familiar embrace. Her "quick dip" had stretched on for almost an hour and the temperature had dropped significantly. After floating on the surface for a long time, her skin exposed to the cool night breeze, she'd felt the need to enjoy one last full body dip before she made her way back to the shore and ended her little midnight adventure.

She'd stayed submerged for almost a minute, and now her lungs were protesting the lack of oxygen. Just as her body uncurled itself to start the short trip to the surface, her ears registered a loud splash beneath the water. Startled, she turned around, her eyes unable to see beyond two feet; the moon rays that filtered through the water became too dim at this depth. Her lungs began to scream for oxygen now and Robin's legs began to kick for the surface when she felt someone grab her by the waist.

_Hunters! _ her mind screamed. How could she have been so careless? Confused and frightened, she tried to pry the arm from her waist with her hands only to feel one muscular arm tighten its hold on her and the other wrap over her arms to pin them down against her chest as she was pulled towards the surface. Seconds later the two figures emerged from the water, Robin took in a wheezing breath and finally managed to turn around, her emerald eyes glowing amber, ready to destroy her attacker with her flame. Instead she found Amon's furious dark gaze staring back at her.

"Amon!?" She managed between coughing fits; she'd nearly chocked when he'd startled her.

Instead of answering her, he grabbed a hold of her wrist and began to drag her as he swam back towards the shore. Once they'd reached the rock platform and climbed up onto it, both Robin and Amon sat down and tried to calm their labored breathing.

After a short while, having regained her breath a bit, Robin turned to face Amon. "Amon, why-?"

"What the hell were you doing?!" he screamed at her, fury burning in his black eyes.

"I was only going for --"

"Shut up," he hissed and got up, yanking Robin up roughly by her wrist with him. Without another word, a still stupefied Robin was dragged up the forest path and back towards the cabin.


	3. Bipolar

Author's notes:

1. This chapter has been almost finished for months now, but I had problems TRYING to not go too out of character...but I think I managed to keep the fluff to a minimum (despite my raging fan-girlie-ness) and keep the dialogue somewhat in character.

2. I finally made myself edit it just in time for valentine's day!! its a happy coincidence :)

3. To the people who left reviews and who added this story to their faves/alerts: I am so flattered/ humbled by your support, this is such a small fandom that seeing there is this much interest really makes me want to keep writtig, and I will.

RPG Girl and yume girl 91 : this is not the end, there will be one more chapter after this one ^_~

Crystal D. Starlit: Oh dear, thank you so much for the enthusiastic expectation. I hope you didn't run out of breath since I last updated :)

CookieThief: I apologize for advance on the slight fluff content of this chapter, I tried I swear! I totally agree, its not like Amon to lose his cool, I totally smacked myself in the forehead when I read your comment, but it was too late to change it, so I added it in this chapter instead.

Mycha: *giggles and jumps around like a little school girl* I am a HUGE FAN of yours, I was so happy by your comment, I couldn't believe you left me a review. TEEHEHEHEHEHEHE!

On to the story...

* * *

_Night turns to day  
And I still have these questions.  
Bridges will break  
Should I go forward or backwards.  
Night turns to day,  
And I still get no answers_

Just a whisper, a whisper, a whisper, a whisper  
Just a whisper, a whisper, a whisper, a whisper

-A Whisper, Coldplay

* * *

*~Bipolar~*

Thanks to Amon's furious speed, they arrived back at the cabin in what felt like mere seconds to Robin. He yanked the front door open and shoved Robin inside in front of him, slamming the door shut behind him with strength that made the windows rattle.

He didn't turn on the lights, but the silver moonlight was enough for Robin to see the ferocity in his gaze.

Robin found herself unable to move; her mind too dazed to know what to do and her body frozen in place. Small puddles were forming around her feet as drops of water slipped down her legs, damp locks of her hair stuck to her face in disarray. She was shivering, though she didn't know if it was from the cold or from fear of the irate man standing in front of her.

He was dripping wet as well; only that he had jumped into the water fully clothed, so that a small lake was forming beneath him as he stared her down. He finally released the grip he held on her wrist, throwing her arm out of his hold almost in disgust and Robin immediately felt the burning on her skin where a bruise was sure to appear later. She stared back at him with terrified eyes. Up to now, all she had witnessed of her warden's emotions was cold detachment and apathy. Nothing before had ever upset Amon to the extent of making him lose his composure like this. Robin felt herself panicking; her chest heaving rapidly as her heart beat increased erratically.

"What the _fuck_ were you doing? Amon hissed slowly, emphasizing every word.

"Amon, I…" Her voice died away, the whisper she'd managed barely audible to begin with.

"You snuck out of your room in the middle of the night and made me think Hunters had killed you already!"

"Amon, please" she begged, her eyes wide and brimming with tears. Whatever bravado she had had earlier in the night dissipated in the face of his wrath.

Amon was aware of how extreme his behavior was at the moment, but he was too inwardly shaken and pissed off to care. All the repressed emotions he had kept within himself had been let loose when he found her gone, and now they were spilling out of him with poisonous revenge, overpowering any rational thought.

"What would have happened if I hadn't found you?! Did you even think about what I would feel when I realized you were gone!?"

"I didn't think you'd find out!" she protested defensively, resenting his last accusation.

Amon seemed surprised at her response and his anger increased even further, if it were at all possible. "And that somehow makes it alright?!"

"No, I just—"

"What!? What were you thinking?! What were you doing?"

She felt the embarrassing tears finally falling from her eyes and she cast her gaze to the floor, unable to stand the weight of his own.

The dark Hunter grabbed her roughly by the shoulders. "Answer me!"

When she looked back at him, her glistening green eyes were full of despair, sadness, fear... They burrowed into him and begged that he calm down.

She was afraid of him, and not only on account of tonight, he realized, as he searched her green depths to find only apprehension and sadness.

There was no trace left of the goddess he had seen gliding freely in the moonlight, exquisitely beautiful and content. Instead, he had reduced her to a frightened little girl, trapped between his anger and her insecurities. Was this the effect he had on her all the time?

Amon felt his heart sinking. She had almost resorted to something unimaginable tonight and instead of comforting and reassuring her he was yelling at her like a madman. He'd almost lost her tonight and now he was pushing her further away.

The rage that had overwhelmed him scant seconds before dissipated into self loathing at the thoughts running through his mind.

He calmed his facial features into a serious expression and he loosened the death grip of his hands on her shoulders but held her firmly still.

"Robin…" his voice was slightly softer now, as soft as he could manage in his current agitated state.

She bit down on her lower lip, gathering her strength and composure for her answer even as tears refused to stop coming. She bravely held his questioning gaze.

"Why--"

"I wanted a bath." Robin stated flatly in defeat, interrupting him before he could finish, finding no escape from his intense stare.

There. She'd said it. She had just revealed to him the extent of her childishness. Now he knew just how ridiculous her reasons for endangering her life were. Now he knew just how carelessly she had acted to destroy all that the had abandoned to protect.

Now he had another reason to loath her.

Her throat tightened as anger replaced the fear she'd felt. She was angry at herself, for being so weak, for breaking down in front of Amon, for not being able to show the maturity she claimed to have, for having been so overcome with need for something as mundane as a bath...

Amon stared at her dumbfounded. He stared at her for a long time, the surprise unmistakable in his expression. He had not been expecting _that_ answer. He blinked. "You…wanted a bath?"

"Yes," she whispered, moving her gaze to the floor once more. "I wanted a bath... The cabin only has showers and I missed taking my baths at night."

Amon's mind was having trouble taking in the meaning of her words. For someone so schooled in keeping emotions from showing in his face, he was having a difficult time regaining his usual cold composure as he stared at her with disbelief.

"That's why you snuck out in the middle of the night without telling me? Because you missed bathing?"

"Yes," her voice was soft and defeated, her eyes cast towards the floor.

"Is…." he swallowed, "is that what's been bothering you lately?"

"Yes," a fresh tear slipped down her cheek as she answered.

Amon studied her face carefully. She wasn't lying, the truth was clear in her eyes. He wanted to laugh out loud and scream at his own stupidity. How could he ever think Robin would try to hurt herself? No matter how bad things got, his Robin never gave up.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He whispered the words gently out loud before he realized what he was saying.

Robin's eyes came back to his, sad and painfully honest, liquid emerald gleaming in the moonlight.

"How could I?" she answered in a muted tone.

Amon nearly physically flinched at her reply.

She was right. How could she possibly tell him anything if he was constantly pushing her away? He had thought it was for the better to alienate himself from Robin. He thought it would be easier. For both of them. He had thought that coldness would eventually kill Robin's feelings for him, he thought it would keep his own emotions under restraint, and that they would somehow just exist like that without incident.

And now as he looked at his beautiful young ward, so delicate despite the immensity of her powers, so strong despite the tenderness of her heart, he realized just how stupid he had been. And though her recklessness was not without blame in this situation, his incompetence as a warden could have cost them both dearly if indeed there had been Hunters on their trail.

Robin could see his mind mulling over the implications of her confession, several fleeting indiscernible emotions flashing in his dark eyes. Her gaze shifted once more to the floor, a useless attempt to try to hide the tears that refused to stop flowing.

Amon's hands on her shoulders tightened momentarily; the only warning he gave her before he did the unthinkable and pulled Robin close against him.

Now it was Robin's turn to be shocked by Amon. She let out a small gasp as his arms wrapped around her back, one hand snaking up to tangle in her damp locks and cradle her head against the crook of his neck.

Amon didn't say anything either. Whatever apology he had would seem insufficient at the moment. So he sought to reassure her with his body instead, hoping that all the remorse and relief he was feeling could pass from his body into hers through his embrace.

His strategy seemed to have some effect, as Robin's rigid posture slowly began to relax, her body melting into his, until a soft sigh escaped her lips and her arms shyly slid to wrap around his waist.

The two stayed like this for a long moment, letting the stress and frustrations that had accumulated for a long time seep out of their skin.

It was Robin who spoke first, tears still stubbornly falling from her eyes, "Amon. I am so sorry, I know it was stupid and dangerous but I promi--"

"Don't," he cut her off, a bit too gruffly judging by the slight tensing of her body against his. "Don't apologize," he continued in a softer tone. "If you acted foolishly it's because my behavior made you think you had no other choice." He craned his head so that his cheek rested atop the crown of her head. "It is I who must apologize to you."

"Why?" she asked innocently, pulling back a bit from his embrace so she could look in his eyes.

What Robin saw there stunned her. The cold, blank and distant look in his eyes that had become a permanent fixture on Amon's facial expression now held a mixture of vivid emotions, clear and confusing at the same time. As she stared at his dark grey eyes, she saw for the first time what she had only suspected to exist beneath the dark surface. Compassion, regret, sorrow, even fear were all clear beneath the surface of that impenetrable gaze.

He held her gaze as he moved his hand to stroke her cheek with his thumb, gently wiping the tears from her face.

Robin was transfixed by his actions. This was so uncharacteristic of him, but instead of releasing her as she had expected, he drew her close again, now both hands cupping her cheeks, until their foreheads were touching and Robin could feel the moist warmth of his breath against her lips.

Amon closed his eyes and sighed deeply, gathering his nerve for what he was about to say.

"Robin," he whispered her name with such tenderness, "I... know you think that the only reason I'm here is to fulfil the promise I made to you in Factory. But you're wrong." he paused for a second, his breathing a little deeper than it had been before. "Robin, I...I care about you, Robin, I care about what happens to you and I want to help you."

As he spoke, his words tickled Robin's nose and chin, their foreheads pressed against one another.

Amon sighed and closed his eyes, "I just...I've never had to watch over anybody before, I haven't lived with somebody else in a very long time. I thought it best for both of us to stay distant from the other, I thought it would be easier."

Another pause.

"But I took things too far Robin, and I'm sorry. I never meant to alienate you to the point that you can't tell me what you need, whatever that may be. I realize I was overly strict with you, as if your freedom was not cut down enough as it is." She could not see it, but the regret in his voice painted his expression in her mind.

She couldn't answer, didn't know what to say to him.

"It was an error on my part and I apologize for it, it will not happen again."

Amon finally separated their bodies, holding Robin at arm's length to analyze her face for any reaction. When he saw her shock-widened eyes staring incredulously at him, he couldn't help but think her awkwardness endearing, though he couldn't blame her for reacting like she did. He was pretty shocked at himself right now.

Capitalizing on the lightheartedness she had just caused him, he ventured a small joke to ease her tension.

I want you to tell me if there is something you need from now on. If you are capable of climbing down from the second floor and run through the woods in the middle of the night for a bath, God only knows what you would do if we ever run out of coffee. I wouldn't be surprised to find you trying to hitchhike your way to Colombia for some special roast"

His strategy worked. Robin's eyes became impossibly wider for a second before her face relaxed and a small chuckle escaped her lips.

It was something Amon had not heard in ages.

Now that he thought about it, he couldn't remember why it had seemed so important to avoid making Robin laugh before. But now that this had happened, he made a mental note of trying to make up for lost laughter in the near future.

Despite the mirth shinning in her eyes, Amon was surprised to once again see fresh tears welling up in her eyes above her timid smile.

But he figured teenage sentimentality coupled with months of intense stress would make anybody overwhelmed when they could finally let their guard down. And yet Robin bravely fought the tears back, unwilling to let go of the sudden rush of happiness.

Feeling carried away with the emotions brought by the events of the night, Amon was too spent to keep from letting the most miniscule of smiles curl his own lips.

Robin's entire face brightened up at the sight. Delicate, slender fingers traced the contour of his lips gently, as if needing proof that her eyes were telling the truth. When she was convinced it was really there, she looked up and gave him the most beautiful, radiant smile Amon had ever seen in his life.

Amon slowly pulled Robin back against his chest, holding her close and revelling on the feeling of_ her_ in his arms. For all the items on his very long list of reasons for why loving Robin was a mistake, _this_ felt too infinitely right to be wrong.

For the fist time Amon considered the possibility that maybe loving Robin and showing her affection was something he could allow himself to do...gradually.

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one more chapter to go!


	4. Equilibrium

A/N: please review the last chapter, I would love to hear general comments on the story, what you thought of the plot, the characters, etc. And thank you to all of the wonderful people who have added this story to their alerts and favorites, you're making me blush. More comments at the end. ps. sorry for the long wait, shit was crazy ^^;

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*~Equilibrium~*

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Amon sighed inwardly as the early spring breeze swept gently over his face, marvelling at how peaceful he suddenly felt. After so many months of constant stress, he could hardly believe he was enjoying such tranquillity today.

Feeling his arm starting to tire, he finally put down the book he'd given up on pretending to read long ago in order to focus his attention on the scenery before him.

From where he sat, under the shade at the edge of the forest, he had a pretty good view of the glimmering aquamarine lake, its surface catching the sun rays and turning them into a living mosaic as the rippling water reflected them back in a thousand different directions.

The weather had turned much warmer in the past two days, and since the new accommodations he had arranged would not be ready for another day, he had agreed to let Robin come for another swim before they left.

He'd _told_ her he'd come with her rather than offered it. He'd assured her that it was a precaution, against the possibility of an attack, and told her he would occupy himself with his reading when her face reddened instantly at the idea of Amon watching her bathe. Better to be overly-cautious than risk an incident, he'd said, if Hunters caught up to them here, then the lake would be the perfect place for an ambush. If Robin was attacked there she would literally be out of her element and completely defenseless, he told her.

He told himself the same thing. But with his gun tucked snugly in its holster and the book he'd been holding up to his face for half an hour still on the first page, Amon had to admit to himself that _maybe_ providing security hadn't really been his only motivation for accompanying Robin.

As he mused over motivations, the previously calm lake surface broke as Robin emerged graceful from her rather long dive. Her golden hair shimmered brightly as it fanned out over the water, catching and reflecting the sunlight. She'd stayed closer to the shore this time, so Amon could make out the smile on her face from his viewing spot. She looked...radiant, he thought. There she was again; the beautiful goddess he'd seen a few nights ago, powerful and confident and happy. She waved her arms beneath the surface so her head and shoulders stood above the water, before her body straightened out to float gently on the surface. This time, she had added a pair of shorts to the black shirt she had worn two nights before since she lacked a proper bathing suit. Maybe something to consider purchasing for future use, Amon thought to himself with a guilty smile.

As Robin settled into floating gently on the water, eyes closed and smile firmly in place, just like he'd first seen her out there, Amon's mind wandered back that night. After their confrontation and Amon's unexpected apology, the two of them had stood in the living room of the small cottage for a long while, both drained from the emotional heights the night had brought on and reluctant to break the comfort of each other's embrace. Amon held her close for a long while after they'd both let out the frustrations that had plagued them since their escape from Japan. As nerves calmed down and the tranquillity of mind began to set in, Amon slowly became aware of Robin's body shaking in his arms.

At first, he thought she was still crying, but a quick glance at her face showed a content smile in place. Feeling drunk on the pleasant haze of this new closeness, Amon's mind was too distracted to come up with an answer.

"Robin, why are you shaking?"

"I'm cold," she said as if the answer should have been obvious to Amon.

Amon's mind quickly snapped out of its reverie, remembering the state they were both in and he pulled gently away from Robin, holding her at arm's length.

His tired mind had forgotten the fact that both he and Robin were soaked, and now the nighttime temperature had significantly dropped. His body hadn't been bothered by it too much since he'd been in the water for scant minutes, and the adrenaline that had surged through him at the moment blocked out other discomforts. But Robin had been in the water far longer than he; her body had felt icy-cold as he pulled her out of the water.

He looked down almost meekly at his sopping wet clothes; he'd failed to take even his shirt off in his frantic rush to get to Robin when he'd jumped in the water, and now the entire living room floor was flooded from the dripping off of his clothes.

He turned his attention to Robin and he was suddenly painfully aware of her near nakedness. The thin material of her cotton shirt was the only barrier between his hands and her skin, and it would not be hard to imagine what that would feel like when her wet shirt clung so tightly to her body, emphasizing the subtle curves of her petite form.

Feeling a rush of blood to his head, Amon let go of Robin altogether, trying not to seem too abrupt about it though it seemed Robin had also just noticed her state of undress, as her arms shot to wrap around her chest and a crimson blush took over her face. Amon didn't have to worry about Robin catching the brief flustered expression that crossed his features, as Robin's gaze shot resolutely to the floor space between them and stayed there, whether it was an attempt to hide her blushing face or an attempt to forget that her guardian had just seen her in nothing but a t-shirt, Amon didn't know, but he took the opportunity to reach behind him to grab the throw blanket which sat on the back of the living room couch next to him. The old knitted blanket left there by previous occupants for decoration purposes would do for improvised cover. Robin flinched slightly as she felt Amon's arms encircling her, but then retreat from her gently. She looked to her shoulder to find a soft, worn blanket wrapped securely around her shoulders and the man who had placed it there standing in the same spot as before, but with his back turned to her.

At a loss for words, Robin could do no more than tighten the blanket around herself, both to cover her body and to try and regain some heat. After a few seconds more of silence, Amon finally cleared his throat and spoke with his usual composed authoritative tone, though it was softer and carried less command than usual. "You've been out in the water for too long and your body temperature is way too low. You could've caught pneumonia staying out in the cold like that. You need to take a hot shower and go to bed already, its far too late for you to be up still." At the slightly scolding words, Robin felt some of her elation leave her, but just as she turned to go upstairs and do as Amon said, he added over his shoulder, "We'll find a place where you can take a warm bath soon enough, for now you'll just have to make do with a shower."

With his back turned to her, he couldn't see the expression on Robin's face, but Amon could almost sense the gentle smile back on her lips and the warmth in her eyes. He had expected her to go upstairs as soon as he was done talking, but he didn't hear a word of reply or retreating footsteps from behind, so Amon hazarded a glance over his shoulder to find the warmth he'd imagined in her eyes but a frown of concern instead of her smile. "What is it?"

"What about you, Amon? You should get a hot shower as well, you're completely soaked."

The words had been spoken in innocent concern, but to Amon's frazzled mind at the moment her gentle words sounded like an invitation to join her. He knew she meant that her using the hot water in her bathroom would mean he would have to wait until she was done so he could use hot water in his. He cleared his throat again, a little more loudly than he'd intended, to dispel unwanted images from his head, "I'll be alright, but you need to warm up now. Go upstairs and take your shower, then go to bed. We can talk in the morning."

"Thank you, Amon," she whispered in reply before Amon heard the soft thudding of bare feet lightly heading upstairs.

He had stayed awake in his room long after the sound of running water and footsteps had stopped in the room across the hall, wondering whether he should feel fortunate that the night's events had caused him to reflect not just about his attitude towards Robin up to that point, but also about the reality of his feelings for her. Though Amon couldn't say with certainty that he had come to terms with them, he had to admit that some of the heaviness had eased off his conscience, that he could begin to allow himself to appreciate his affection towards Robin rather than chastise himself for feeling the way he did. Looking at the picture of beauty and quiet contentment before him now, he thought to himself that fortunate was definitely the right word to describe himself.

Robin's body disappeared below the water again, and when she surfaced again, she was at the water's edge, climbing up onto the rocky shore and reaching for her towel. She had come prepared this time, and she slipped her long black coat on before folding the now-damp towel back neatly and starting up the path towards him.

Hidden from her line of sight as he was, Amon opened his book and pretended to be deeply absorbed by as Robin approached him. She finally came to stand next to him, a few feet away, patiently waiting for him to knowledge her presence. Coming to the end of an imaginary paragraph in his book, Amon put the book down on his lap and glanced up at Robin.

The warmth in her eyes that had been born two nights before was still there now, inviting and pleasant. "Have you had enough swimming for one day?" Robin's only reply was a soft smile and a nod. Amon stood up and brushed the dirt off his trousers before turning back to Robin, and as he looked at her he was rather shocked to see before him the same goddess she had been in the water, confident and content, instead of the insecure girl waiting for his command. She was waiting for him because she wanted to, not because she felt she had to out of some sense of deference for her guardian. Amon was surprised to note how in just a couple of days, his perception of Robin had changed so much.

Maybe it wasn't just his perception, but Robin who had begun to assert her maturity now that she had been given the chance to do so, no longer feeling the need to hide herself and obey quietly. Amon was inwardly pleased with the slight change, and he let just the smallest of smiles to curl the corners of his lips. "Shall we go, then?" he said. As they made their way up the path they walked in silence, enjoying the sounds of birds chirping on the tree tops and the gentle breeze blowing from the lake. It was such a complete contrast to the first trip they'd made from the lake towards the cabin, Amon was definitely starting to think 'fortunate' was the word to describe the events that led them here.

"Amon?"

"Hm?"

"Do you think we can come again tomorrow? Just for one last swim before we leave?"

"I suppose, it'll give me chance to get some more reading done. It's a very interesting book, you know?" Amon said, hiding a small mischievous smirk from Robin with some well placed locks of black hair.

"Good, I'm glad you didn't get too bored" Robin said.

"Not at all."

Fortunate was the right word indeed.

*~The End~*

Author's notes:

So, out of characterness was far too abundant in this chapter, I feel. I honestly read back from the beginning and thought, Oh god, this is terrible, but I think it was a good first fic ever, and thought the content wasn't something that is really pertinent to WHR, the thought came to my head and for whatever reason, I wrote it down out of the millions of other thoughts that came to my head. I'm only beginning to clumsily explore the world of writing, and I guess its impossible to be a good writer right away, so thanks to all the people who provided reviews, constructive criticism and encouragement. Special shout out to my betta reader, who is just the awesomest betta reader ever. Catherine Grissom, I wouldn't have finished this without you :)


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